Resolve

Seeing as my anxious nature leaves me more or less constantly resolving to do or improve X and Y while simultaneously agonizing that I have failed to do thing Z that I resolved to do 2 weeks ago, I’ve never been too excited about  New Year’s resolutions.  Last January I did decide that I would make a concious effort to refuse plastic bags unless absolutely necessary, and tenderly wipe clean and reuse little clear plastic produce bags.  And I have to say, I stuck to it.   There ain’t no wad of SafewayLongsThankYou bags under my sink, friends.  But now that it’s 2008, and I’ve already single-handedly saved the environment, and things at work are slow as molasses, I thought I’d kill some time pondering self improvement.

Here’s a great resolution I thought of:  NO PUBLIC WHISTLING UNLESS YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON IN EARSHOT OF YOU.  This resolution is not for me, because I don’t whistle.  It’s for all the people who whistle both tunefully and intentionally untunefully in proximity to me, usually in a situation where I can’t really bolt for the exit.  Like I’m at work or something.  Dude.  Shut UP!  And also stop clicking your clicky pen for no reason while you whistle.  I realize I could resolve to be more tolerant of  others, but I gave up on that a long time ago.

Here’s a resolution I thought of for me:  HAVE HOT CEREAL FOR BREAKFAST 80% OF THE TIME NOT COUNTING SATURDAYS BECAUSE THAT’S FRIED EGG SANDWICH/FRENCH TOAST/WAFFLE DAY.  I do eat a lot of hot cereal already; more than the average American, I’d venture to say.  And I like it.  I like oatmeal (the real kind, not the nasty packet kind).  I like Cream of Wheat.  I like oatmeal and Cream of Wheat mixed together (no, it’s good!  really!).  I like thinking, as I eat my oatmeal, that my breakfast only cost me 15 cents to make.  But many times when I arise from the warm coocoon of Morning Edition and 3 layers of blankets, I find myself disinclined to boil water and stir things.  I’m ensnared by the TJ’s Honey Nut O’s crooning their siren song from the top of the fridge.  Not this year!  Shut it, O’s!  Come Sunday night I’m making a big ol’ pot of the finest oatmeal-Cream o’ Wheat blend and parcelling it out into little tupperwares, one for each workday.  52 weeks x 5 workdays x 15 cents=$39 for a whole year of weekday breakfast.

Heh.  We’ll see how long that lasts.

I also just decided to resolve to get rid of all my million year old socks with holes.  I think I can manage that one.  If nothing else it’s a good excuse to go to Target.